Sounds good. Hope it goes as planned.

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Thanks Steve, this has been one hell of a long road for me and your support without question has helped me get through it.

I'll never be able to thank you enough for that, just knowing that one person had an interest in anything i had to say meant the world to me... much of what i had to say likely meant little to anyone, indeed much of what i posted likely flew right over many a head... jeez, if i'd read any of what i've posted in the last year was put to me this time last year i'd have thought i was off my head!

If i take one thing from my experience it'll be that small actions can have huge consequences.

I thank you with all my heart, your words, along with my experince, have made me re-evaluate my whole life and understanding of what life actually means.

I simply cannot thank you enough.

Thanks Jay, it had better or i'm going to look stupid, not for the first time! LOL

You can't do wrong with Tom Petty.

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stephen boots
Microsoft MVP 2004 - 2020
"Life's always an adventure with computers!"

Another update.... this one i hope will be one of the last updates i give of 'My experience' in this thread, but with this virus who knows.

So far my recovery contiunes to improve in that i've not had any setbacks since Christmas day, i still suffer from mild bouts of insomnia and tiredness but they are far from anything i've suffered from since August.

I'm so confident that i'll be able to return to work that i've pencilled a date into my diary of Feb 1st (or the closest available date afterwards) for that to happen.

The only reason for the lag between now and Feb 1st is because i want to make sure i'm free of this evil virus before i return to work... the last thing i want to happen is for a relapse while at work that'll put me back on sick leave.

If my recovery is still at the same level ths time next weekend i plan to contact my employer to discuss my return to work.

After the road i've been down, i cannot find the words to express what this feels like... actually, there are no words.

Doddie, I also hope you are finally on the road to recovery, given what you have been through.

Have you or will you be receiving any type of Covid vaccine? Or is that even applicable following a bout of long Covid?

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BB
http://barrypatch.net

My understanding is that Long Covid will not be factor for when i'm offered a vaccine... to date i have not been offered a vaccine and i have on idea when one will be offered.

According to NHS Scotland:
https://www.nhsinform.scot/healthy-living/immunisation/vaccines/coronavirus-covid-19-vaccine/who-will-be-offered-the-coronavirus-vaccine

When i'm called up for a vaccine i do of course have a preference (anything but an NRA vaccine would be my first choice), but what i get given is out of my control and in reality i won't care, i'll just be glad that that i've been vaccinated.

I don't see any alternative to what i've gone through this year, so absolutely i will take whatever vaccine is offered, even if whatever vaccine makes me temporarily ill i'll take it in a heartbeat if it means i never have to go through what i've lived through this year.

That said, if you'd asked me the same question in August my answer would likely have been very different... but this isn't August 2020, its Jan 2021 and we know a whole lot more than we did then... or at least i hope we do.

I guess i have a longer road to go down than i hoped, two days ago my health once again declined in that the nausea, vertigo, brain fog, and more, returned.

I don't now if this is related to the fact i had another "welfare call" yesterday from my employer or not... probably not, but the stress of the 70 minute call likely didn't help?

As the call went on, my health, mental and physical, seemed to decline by the minute... at that end of the call i attached the oximeter i bought two months ago and my bpm was 138 with oxygen level at 85%.... all despite sitting in a rested position.
(Don't get me wrong, the line manager said the right things, but i doubt if the roles were reversed they'd think these types of calls were appropriate.)

During the call my wife made me a cup of coffee and i couldn't even pick it up, the tremors i was experiencing were so bad that the coffee ended up all over the table before i'd lifted it a few inches from my workstation... even worse was when i tried to write down a couple of notes in a (paper) notepad before the call started, i couldn't read a word of what i wrote... to the point i had to type them out in a word doc on my pc in case i needed them.

My next port of call is to speak to my GP to arrange a referral to one of the Covid rehab centres that my GP assured me the last time i spoke to her a few weeks ago have now been established in Scotland.

As much as i've been trying to look on the bright side of life, i'm beginning to think there isn't one.

Not good to hear.

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It's the world i live in, not ideal, but it is what it is... eventually my life will change for the better... i just need to hang onto the fact that that day is coming.

I have three choices, either that my life life will never be the same again or i'll never get get it back, i firmly believe in the third...

The third choice is to never give up.

Good thought for any situation.

• Every day we live means that our life will never be the same as what we do today changes what we will face tomorrow.
• Can't get it back as back is history and already done. I know this is not likely as to be the same as what you meant but everyone's yesterday is done and gone. It affects our today but need not define our tomorrow. What we do today is much more important as to affecting our tomorrow than what we did yesterday. "Live each day as it it comes" is an old saying but is important. We can't change yesterday and we can't know tomorrow. Our control is only in today.
• To give up is to stop living. Striving is what life is about. I pity the person that is so set in their way that they never strive to change. When I got hurt in the Navy and lost the use of my right eye I was told I'd never have depth perception again. That was true but didn't need to be a restriction as to what I did. I love base/soft ball but, from what I was told, I could not do with any hope of success. Not long after I was one of the better outfielders in our softball league. If playing outfield isn't judging distance I don't know what is. The point is that our bodies are remarkable machines and our mind the best computer known. Our biggest restriction is believing when told we can't do. No one but ourselves can decide whether we can or can't.

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Sorry to read of the setback, Doddie.
And, Jay, I *love* your bullet points!

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stephen boots
Microsoft MVP 2004 - 2020
"Life's always an adventure with computers!"

Thanks Steve. It is sort of how I live my life. It goes with a couple of other attitudes that I have.

• I will accept adult responsibilities and react to situations in an adult manner but I flatly refuse to "grow up". One must keep the child within alive and well.
• Anyone can say what they want about me and I really don't care. If what is said is the truth it makes me no more or less than what I am by being said. If what is said is not the truth it just does not matter as I know what is true about myself.

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Two more excellent bullet points. I strive to live by these, too.

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stephen boots
Microsoft MVP 2004 - 2020
"Life's always an adventure with computers!"

So very, very, true

I believe it was Confucius that said:

Quote:

"Truth may depart from human nature: If what is regarded as truth depart from human nature, it may not be regarded as truth"

@ Steve & Jay.

Since my post on 22nd Jan i hadn't read your posts until today because yesterday was another day when i couldn't face interaction so i stayed away from being online.... truth be told i'm still trying to take in what was posted... but what Jay posted was quite profound and i heard evey word of it.

i.e. In a sense i do now need to take control of what is happening in my life.

What's been difficult for me up to this point has been trying to understand how to take control of my life when there are no known answers.

I'm still not sure what my next move should be but clearly i need help, and accepting what my GP is telling me, namely that they don't know.... is no longer an option.

Up to this point i've been relatively calm and gone along with what the medics have told me, likely hard to understand given the research i've posted here but for all my life i've trusted (and been told to trust) the medical profession, to break away from that and start telling them they are wrong goes against everything i've ever known.

So, starting tomorrow, i will attempt to enrol in one of the government backed post-covid rehabilitaion schemes and fight back if i feel they don't give me the support i feel i deserve.

To be clear, this will go against how i was brought up and will not sit well with me but i need to draw a line somehwere and if i don't attempt to do it now i likely never will.

To be clearer, Jay and Steve, you haven't just given birth to some mad militant... you have though opened my eyes that enough is enough and the very least l need to do is question the care i'm getting, coupled with expecting more from myself.

While doubtful you expected this reply, i thank you anyway.

While it is frustrating I would, personally, prefer that a doctor told me that he/she didn't know rather than they try to hide their ignorance by pretending to know everything. It is just like with a computer tech. If one claims to know everything about computers I would never deal with the person as such a level of knowledge is just not possible.

I don't know how doctors are where you live but my experience is that a GOOD doctor wants questions. It is through your questions that a doctor gets a lot of insight as to what is actually going on with you. For instance asking a doctor if riding a stationary bike or using a treadmill will help build back up your stamina would tell the doctor that you are willing to try to take proactive measures. Another good question might be if practicing Yoga breathing exercises might help. It has been proven that such Yoga exercises can drastically improve respiratory function which would also help with stamina.

I don't know that I would consider some of what I said a few posts back to be profound. It is just how I try to live my life and is natural to me.


Is the truth "couldn't" or is it closer to the truth to say "it was easier to not bother"? Through my 66.25 years of existence I have found that the harder course of action tends to give the greater rewards. Of course this is not 100% but tends to be the truth. I think the difference is that the harder course of action tends to teach us more about ourselves than the easier route. If nothing else it empowers ourselves with the knowledge that we can face difficulty with success. Even if we fail in a specific attempt; just the full attempt gives us an increase of inner strength as no full blown attempt is ever a true failure. The true failure is to not make the attempt.

Sigh ( with a touch of LOL! on the side ), Yes, I have often been told I should have been a counselor. When I was in the Navy I had a nick name with many as "Preacher".

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As well as other symptoms, i was suffering with brain fog and a headache meaning i was in no fit state to read much, i also had really bad tremors in my hands and arms that meant i couldn't control my mouse, typing was possible but not being able to use the mouse to navigate around pages it was too frustrating, so i gave up and watched tv instead.

So, to answer your question the truth is a bit of both, i tried but couldn't so i chose not to bother.

I've been wanting to do this for a while, post a list of the symptoms i've suffered from since i first suspected i caught Covid back in Feb 2020.

Before i get to the list i should probably note that i have no underlying health issues and i am very rarely off work, i think in the 5 years up to 2020 it was less than 5 days sick leave, all due to the flu (or a bad cold).
Aside from hives and the lower back pain (possibly it was sciatica that i historically suffer from at times?) that i suffered in March and April, all the other symptoms emerged in August when i had to stop work and in varying degrees continue to this day.

Actually before i get to the list i want to tell you a funny story, the hallucinations don't happen very often but when they do they scare the living daylights out of me!
On the run up to christmas my wife went to the local shop, when the apartment door closed i was convinced a pigeon flew out from behind the christmas tree... i saw what i thought was a silhouette of a pigeon flying across the living room towards the tv... i nearly jumped off the couch but told myself that wasn't possible, it didn't stop me sitting there for a good 10 seconds looking around for a pigeon that didn't exist before i convinced myself that what i thought i saw wasn't real.
The look on my wifes face when i told her what had happened was priceless, i thought she was going to have me sectioned!

Anyways, the list... if anyone wants to know more please feel free to ask.

Violent shaking
Trembling
Brain Fog
Confusion
Forgetfulness
Loss of smell
Loss of appetite
Loss of taste (change of, would be a better description)
Hearing Strange sounds
Shadows in corner of eyes
Tinnitus
Muscle pain
Lower Back pain
Swollen glands
Breathlessness
Anxiety
Frustration
Isolation
Demoralisation (due to not being believed)
Feelings of sadness
Diarrhoea
Belching
Gas production increases/decreases
Insomnia
Fatigued sleep
Stomach cramping/intestinal cramps
Floaters in vision
Night sweats
Hallucinations
Vomiting
Sensitivity to light, sound, movement
Hives
Excessive bleeding gums
Metallic taste in mouth
Dizziness
Feeling feverish without a temperature
Nausea
Low oxygen levels
Trouble trying to form words
Trouble focusing attention
Vertigo
Tachycardia
Extreme fatigue

While pretty sure there are more that i've forgotten about, that about covers the main ones.

I'm doing everything i can to get answers and help, whether or not i'm asking in the right places remains to be seen.

CH has been an invaluable source for me to outlet my frustrations, along with trying to highlight the dangers of this disease, in an ideal world where our leaders were up to the job i likely wouldn't be posting about this here.

A case in point is that i got a reply from an MSP (Member of the Scottish Parliament) today who i contacted on 5th November 2020, why it took so long for the reply i have no idea but it goes against the suggestion my GP told me just a few weeks ago that 'covid clinics' were now active in Scotland... i've searched to see if Covid Clinics are indeed set up in Scotland but i can't find anything online that supports my GP. That'll be an intersting discussion when i call her, she's suggested that before only to be proven wrong.


Hopefully Andy Wightman is able to come back with something positive but i'm not holding my breath.

We are all learning to fly when it comes to this disease:

Tom Petty And The Heartbreakers - Learning To Fly (Version 1)
https://youtu.be/s5BJXwNeKsQ

Doddie, your statement of:

made me think of something I wrote many years ago. On the surface it looks to contain many flaws as to such things as the usage of "I", "We", "Us" and "Myself" but that is not really the case. It is about meeting oneself and the realization that accepting all aspects of oneself is that which makes us whole.

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Jay, you just put a huge smile on my face!

For what it's worth i don't see that as meeting oneself, rather it's about reaching out to others for friendship and hope, but at the end of day we are masters of our own destiny.

That said, poetry flies right over my head so i'm likely misunderstanding everything lol.

Actually one writes and sees from within oneself. That does not mean that others will see it the same way and that is fine. Poetry, or in this case I think it would be termed prose, is about getting someone to think about something. If the other person's interpretation does not match your exact message it is enough that you made the person think. To be honest I have had people think it is about meeting one's soulmate or an angel. Regardless of how taken I consider it a success as it does seem to make others think. I've never bothered but have considered submitting to Reader's Digest for publication.

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You should!